Expectations

Do you remember when you were single and people used to say, "It will happen when you least expect it," talking about finding love?  So you'd try and try to stop expecting to meet Mr. Right every time you turned around, all the while actually still having that expectation by trying NOT to expect it.

I'm feeling kind of that way right now.  I think that I expect God to give me a baby as soon as I completely turn over this season of my life to Him.  That as soon as I fully trust and believe, that POOF-- I'll have a baby in my belly.  And while it may happen, I have to realize that is just may not.  That I may get to that point of trust and faith and belief and still not be blessed with a child just yet. 

I have to get to the point where I am okay with whatever God wants, not just when it's what I want.  I need to keep going towards the believing and trusting, but stop expecting things to work out exactly how I want them to as soon as I get to a "better place" of acceptance and peace.  I am not guaranteed to have things easily.  I'm just guaranteed that God will be with me the whole way.

Lord, help me not to expect You to grant my every wish.  Teach me how to pray during this time so that I can honor You.  My desire is to have a child, but Lord, I want what is best for me, and only You know that.  Allow me to submit to Your plans.